Always, I Wanna Be with You
by Latez
Summary: When a certain Earl requests the impossible from his Butler, his command might just backfire. Especially when he's kidnapped by a certain bear and led across dimensions. Chaos and hilarity ensues. Pure crack.
1. The Command

**Written in honor of my broskies birthday. :) Happy Birthday, just one of your many gifts XD Thanks for being an awesome friend, an inspiring person, a great listener, an HNIC, being born, and the greatest person I know. :'3 I'm gonna start crying... hehe. Everyone, please enjoy the story!**

**For those who don't know, anything in** _italics _**are thought moments and anything in bold ****_italics_**** is like switching viewpoints or settings to focus on a different character. **

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"Wakey wakey, young master." A familiar suave voice said, opening the curtains within the grand bedroom.

"Mrrr," was the only noise the young boy responded with, being struck with the light that beamed down eagerly to his waiting, tired face. As if trying to escape it, unconsciously, the bluenette reached over to his other pillow and slammed it down on his face.

"Now don't be like that."

The demon reached over and grabbed the pillow from the boy, easily yanking it away with his strength. Ciel groaned and turned away from the light.

"Come now, the light won't hurt you."

"Piss off."

"You're just tired, that's why you're being so mean..." The butler fake pouted, still holding the pillow in his hand. "Anyway, you could have easily suffocated yourself if you had kept this on your face too long." He said with a smile. _And maybe that would have been a good idea..._ He thought at the same time.

"What, so now you're my hero?" Ciel snapped angrily, the light still finding it's way to further piss him off along with his annoying butler. He wrapped himself in blankets, covering his head to shade himself.

"Tsk tsk." Sebastian responded, waving a finger. "No wonder you're still a child, you lack the understanding and importance an Earl has. You have many duties to attend to, master, and those duties can't be seen too if you're sleeping on the job."

He walked over to his Master's side and gripped the sheets he was folded in.

"You look like a caterpillar trapped in a cocoon," He chuckled, as he unraveled the sheets nimbly with speed despite his master's pleads, "And all caterpillars must leave their shell and learn to fly~!"

"HEY!" But Ciel's body was left to shiver without warmth from his sheets.

"You will pay for this dearly, Sebastian." Ciel yawned through half-narrowed eyes, slowly sitting up. His hair was a mess and his nightshirt revealed his bare shoulder from his awkward position. He also reeked of morning breath.

"Of course, my lord." Sebastian smiled back, putting the sheets down and kneeling to start dressing his master.

**_Meanwhile, outside the Manor..._**

"I HIT THE THE JACKPOT!" A furry chuckle escaped the bear as his eyes widened and his mouth began to drool from the site of his newest pray.

The bear had been walking through the woods, looking for a fellow woodland creature, fish or an adolescent child to sink his teeth into.

"I'm so damn hungry..." He sulked as he padded along, holding his growling stomach (and other things) sadendly.

His earlier dinner wasn't at all enough to satisfy him. Little Johnny just kept running and running, the chase was exciting, at least. But the aftertaste was horrid and Little Johnny just kind of... took it. There was nothing fulfilling about it without hearing the screams.

"It's just too sad that Little Johnny fox had to die like that." The bear sighed remembering the plump fox he had eaten. "At least I didn't have to use any of my special tools."

The bear peeked at his supplies within his hidden furry pocket. Laced candy in one pocket, regular in the other, colorful balloons to make animals, roofies, kiddy toys, rope, blindfold, binoculars, camera, and his car keys to his signature white van.

"They're all here, all I need is something to use it on."

It was then that the most pleasant sound took hold of his eardrums. A child's voice.

The bear immediately became joyful. He had stopped dead in his tracks. His ears were perked, following the sound and the general direction the noise had come from. His body led him to the edge of the forest, into a large well-kept land. He quickly hid himself behind a bush on the very border of the land, peeking his head up in fear he would be spotted if he were to venture further onto the grounds. His ears twitched again, the voice more powerful as he was closer to it, and he heard the child once more. He dug through his supplies and quickly produced his binoculars.

There, through the window of the large manor, the bear could see a young boy. Everything about him was beautiful. The way his blue hair carefully laid down around his face, his blue piercing gaze, those earrings, and oh that eye patch! The bear wanted him, badly. _He's so perfect... _the bear was on the verge of tears from just staring at the boy's dazzling figure.

"Hmm this won't be easy," the bear had only just noticed the adult like figure standing near the child, cringing at the sight. _Keep your filthy hands off him you bastard._ He lowered the binoculars slightly and his eyes narrowed, _He's mine._

_**Back inside...**_

"Your breakfast this morning shall be pain perdu complimented with a side of hot maple syrup freshly gathered from the nearest Maple Tree and served with your usual tea of choice, Earl Grey."

He put it down gracefully and bowed. "Enjoy your meal, young master."

The Butler presented the dish beautifully, taking extra care not to let a single drop from the syrup touch the plate within one-inch of the actual bread. Served on the finest China money in that century could buy. To say the least, the dish was spotless.

Ciel simply snorted, carefully putting on his napkin and picking up his silver. He had been through this same routine too many times before. Everything he had was carefully prepared, perfection at it's finest, and was always delicious. But the thing that was most irritating to him was the fact that his butler just wouldn't_ mess up_.

_We're all human, we all make mistakes,_ he chewed his food angrily, _He just seems to want to reiterate the fact that he will never make a mistake._

"Is it to your liking, my Lord?" Sebastian inquired, attempting to analyze the anger plastered on his master's face as he ate.

"How could one expect anything less?" Ciel responded indifferently padding his napkin on his mouth, "Of course from, 'One Hell of a Butler' as yourself."

Sebastian smiled, "You took the words right from my mouth."

It was then Ciel had an idea.

_Let's see what you think when you can't fulfill a command._ He thought to himself, a smile tugging his lips as his free eye locked with the crimson of his Butler. This was his childish behavior taking light in his usual stiff, cold self.

"Sebastian," He began slowly as the idea flooded his mind, "I have a request for you to fulfill."

"Your wish is my command." The butler responded, placing a hand over his heart and bowing.

"Well, you see, this... CREATURE I would like you to find is most rare." He had to hold in his laugh as he continued, "You are aware of the mythical creature known as a Unicorn, correct?"

"Of course."

"Well, that is the creature I would wish for you to find."

The Butler smiled back at his master. He accepted his challenge, knowing fully well what his master wanted of him. He obviously wasn't retarded, hell he was well over a hundred years old in human terms. And being the hell of a butler he was, he knew exactly where to find this creature.

"Then it shall be done, I only hope that I can make it back before this afternoon's tea wi-"

He was cut off as the child continued, wickedness shining in his eye, "But not just any unicorn, no. Being an Earl I of course demand the highest grade beast money can buy. I wish for it to be..." his voice trailed off as he gazed around the room, searching for a color that would be nearly impossible to replicate, "Rainbow. With an... automated body that can allow it to have the freedom to jump and dash (with the appropriate commands of course) whenever it feels free too. But can also be tamed by a mere mortal just the same. Oh, and with it's dashes, rainbow's must trail behind it in it's epicness."

Sebastian simply stared at his master. His smile still managed to glue to his face, not betraying a single other emotion other than obedience and happiness.

His voice said, "Not a problem, I will see to your specifications, young master. And I will return, beast in hand; all for your pleasure."

While in his mind he simply REALLY wanted to choke his cocky, childish lord. _That little prick. He just wants to make me look like a complete fool. Do those things even fucking exist in the 19th century?!_

"Good. Now be back before my afternoon tea." Ciel smiled back kindly, something that he only does when he wants to make you suffer.

Sebastian began to gather the silver and other dishware his master had finished, carefully laying them back onto the cart he usually brought out. His brow began to twitch on it's own, letting all of the command now sink in further.

"What's the matter Sebastian? 'If you couldn't do this much, what kind of butler would you be' correct?" Ciel called as the demon began to walk away.

Sebastian turned behind him and called back with equal determination, "I just hope the young master will be fine without his Butler until noon. It's a challenge for both of us, my lord." and with that he walked out of the room.

It was only about five minutes later when the Butler departed, making sure to leave the other servants with his duties and specific instructions for the young master's care.

"Now, if I come back and find the manor ablaze, guess what's going to happen?" He asked happily.

Finny timidly raised his hand, "You'll hang our behinds triumphantly above the fireplace?"

"Not quite."

MeyRin stuttered out, "Y-you'll leave us with no meals for the rest of the week?"

"Close."

"You'll shank us with silverware?" Bardroy shouted with disbelief.

"Correct."

The three servants glanced at one another.

_"We promise we won't mess up."_ They all said in unison.

"Good." The demon nodded as he opened the large front door to the manor and stepped out before turning around and checking his pocket watch within his vest, "I'll be back promptly at twelve o'clock sharp. I expect _nothing_ will happen in my absence." He said with finality and then swiftly closed the door right in there faces and left.

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**So guess what, 'pain perdu' is basically french toast but in french! YA! :D The more you knowwww~! But ya, if you haven't picked up on it already, I am NOT historically accurate when it comes to this. I mean, I try, but there will obviously be plot holes only because this is a CRACK story. This is why Pedobear can have a white van and Unicorns can exist in the 19th century. Oh and there wlll be references to well known stuff in here, like the Pedobear meme as you've seen along with: Robot Unicorn Attack (AWESOME GAME), Okami, an OC whale named Sheldon, and many MANY more. I sincerely hope you enjoyed the first chapter, and please do drop a review and follow/favorite! Thank you so much!**

**This next part is for my broskie in particular that I'd like you to read (you all can read it if you like, it kind of explains some of the character's that will be coming in future chapters anyway): **

**ON THIS DAY, AUGUST 24 (will not say year ;) LATEZ's GREATEST BROSKIE WAS BORN. A sunny day, August 24 was also known for being the day the first scientist had discovered and captured a robot unicorn. The progress onwards was commendable. To this day Robot Unicorns roam the earth, searching for robot fairy's and stars to bust through with rainbows shooting out of their assholes. Coincidentally on that same day, marine biologists stumbled upon a certain... "Mutant" whale in the Atlantic. It consisted of a long blond like hair braid down it's front face, a prominent unibrow, and extremely small fins for such a big ass whale. It's personality consisted of major derping along characteristics of pedophilia It's most notable competitor and long time rival is the Pedobear, a land like bear that has somehow found it's way into the ocean. Scientists believe that all the used up young girls and boys on land were not satisfactory for the bears hunger, thus, he made his way into the ocean to prey on young, adolescent fish and marine creatures. August 24 was also the blessed day that J. Michael Tatum realized his voice acting godliness and talent and auditioned for his first MAJOR role, a certain butler whose voice can make any woman pregnant. Happy Birthday Buddy and it's twelve o'clock midnight so I think I'll be going to bed now. Love ya and let THIS SHIP SAILLLL~! :U **


	2. Like a Bear

**CHAPTER 2! Yaaaa, this is weird, I usually never and I mean like EVER update this fast. O.e It's strange but hey, I guess I really got into writing this story to write 2 chapters in one day :P Imma finish this story if it kills me, I swear. FOR THE SHIPPPP! Oh and one thing to clear up, if you're worried about Pedobear and his... "antics," I can assure you this story will NOT turn into one of those one-sided romance/pedophilia bullshit -.-. So don't worry :3 I mean like the most he'd ever do is cuddle! XD Enjoy. **

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The bear watched from his safe view behind the bush, still hidden, as the demon ran; arms folded flatly behind his back and taking long strides, almost like a torpedo gliding swiftly through the ocean.

_So he's leaving huh?_ An evil grin took hold of him _Now's my chance._

Once the demon was far enough away, the bear quickly stood up and ran back into the forest, towards the road nearest to the manor. Swiftly digging his paws into his pocket, he produced his keys. Unlocking the driver side to his white van, he practically leaped in from his pure and utter bliss.

_Time for me to get a shota_ he thought, licking his lips hungrily, as he started the ignition and slammed the accelerator.

He drove at a ridiculous speed, hardly legal if there had been a law back then, down the road that led to the manor. He drifted into the circle (or square?) near the main door to the manor like a badass and parked closest to the steps.

_This'll have to be a grab and GO._ the bear thought when he parked the van and straightened up his fur with his paws, trying to look at least somewhat presentable (he pretty much forgets he's a bear).

Walking up the steps, he stopped to gather his thoughts before knocking on the door. There was silence for a couple of minutes then shattered by a sudden crash and lots of yelling. The bear was greeted by the pyro cook.

"Eh, may I help ya mister?" The cook was rubbing the back of his head with his hand and laughing nervously, his eyes closed as the smoke was escaping into the outside from the open door. He prayed to God that the other servants had managed to at least hide the mess from the rat they had set on fire, which inevitably ended with some of the tapestry catching fire when they had finally cornered it.

"Uh yes," The bear said indifferent to the smoke hitting his face as it leaked out, "I was wondering if I could have a look, -er, I mean have an acquaintance with the young boy of this estate."

"A young boy? *cough* Do you mean the young master?" the cook coughed from the remaining smoke airing out.

The bear's eyes widened.

_Master? Wait... he lives in a huge house, this guy looks looks like a servant, and the man I had watched dress him didn't at all look like he could be his father._

The bear pondered for a moment as the realization finally struck him.

_He's a child AND he's rich! 2 for 1 deal!_ He seriously wanted to fist the air and do backflips of joy right now, but managed to hold it in the presence of the man standing before him. "Well yes, the master I suppose. If that wouldn't be too much trou-"

The bear was cut off when the cook finally opened his eyes and realized _what_ he was talking to.

"HOLY SHIT! You're a bear!" He screamed. "Why the hell are you standing and talking and shit?!" Hyperventilating almost immediately as his eye twitched with confusion.

"Yes I am but I'm still a person _inside_." the bear corrected him, "I believe I have just as much rights as any normal perso-"

"BEARS AREN'T PEOPLE. I learned that much in freaking school!" The cook stopped suddenly as his eyes widened, "Wait... if you're a bear, than you eat meat."

He was connecting the dots, "And if you eat meat than you can eat people!"

He began screaming again, "LIKE HELL YOU'LL EAT MY FINE ASS... or the master's!" He slammed the door right in the bear's face and triple locked it with what locks there were, leaving the bear stunned and alone outside.

But this little development wouldn't get the better of him. He was determined to have his prize.

_We'll just have to find another way in._

The bear looked around and noticed a window slightly ajar on ground level, one of the ways the servants had taken it upon themselves of letting the smoke out. _There we go._

The bear walked over and easily broke the glass itself with his bare paw, essentially defeating the whole purpose of finding an open window. Crawling in, he ended up in a large bedroom most likely used for guests. Walking to the door, the bear entered a large hallway with many other doors. He groaned inwardly at the sight of so many. _How am I supposed to find the little bitch in this huge place?_

He walked to the first door and opened it, only to be greeted with a herd of cat's stuffed into a closet used for storage. _The fuck?_ The cat's mewed eagerly as they were released from their prison, rushing out in hordes.

_Whatever._ The bear thought and instead found a staircase leading to the upper floor and walked up. Walking to a random door, for once, luck was on his side. Inside, he found a certain bluenette lazily drinking his tea and reading the latest newspaper. His legs hoisted and crossed on his study, hardly gentlemanly for an Earl, but he really didn't care since Sebastian wasn't there to scold him. The command had also given him time to do whatever the hell he wanted for once, might as well use it to it's fullest potential.

The bear immediately smiled and approached the boy, putting on his 'fun-cuddly-bear-buddy' routine he had practiced so many times with other foolish children. "Well hello there little boy."

Ciel put down his paper and looked up at the bear, rubbing his eyes. _Did those useless idiots drug my tea?_ "Hello?" he responded slowly and unsure.

"So, how are you today?" He asked smoothly.

"Fine? I guess."

"Good, good" the bear knew better than to rush things. Slow and steady. He produced his laced candy, "Say I have this candy here and I was wondering if you want some, I can't eat it all myself!" Beckoning the boy with the candy.

"I don't care for sweets."

"Alright well, that's ok. I have these balloons animals though, just tell me your favorite and I'll make it for you. You just have to stand up and come get it." He coaxed the boy yet again with the balloon.

"Listen, I'd like you to get to the point of why you're in my manor. Much less my study. I have important things things to attend to, and if your reason for speaking with me doesn't have anything of vital importance then please just leave." He spoke irritated, "Also, I'm not a child. I don't want your candy, balloons, gifts, or whatever. I'm here for business and business alone."

The bear just stood there. This was one of the smarter kids. Smart and rich. But a noise shook him from his thoughts, footsteps approaching the door.

The bear was quick to act and get to the point.

"Alright, I'll make this simple for your pretty little rich boy mind to understand. I like ya, and I wantcha ya. Now, we can do this the easy way or the we can do this the hard way. The choice is yours."

"Um, you want me?" The boy responded, confused.

"Hey, master!" The same pyro voice sounded, pounding on the door, "Um... we got a problem."

_Shit! He'll come in if the boy tells him._ The bear wasn't going to let this happen. With great speed the bear dashed to the boy, jumping over the desk and putting his arms underneath the boy's shoulders and hoisting him from his chair.

"Hey! Let me go mff!" his voice was muffled as the bear gently placed a paw to cover the boy's mouth.

The cook had heard his master's muffled scream and immediately proceeded to kick down the door. "You let him go!" He screamed at the familiar beast.

The bear growled in response, "What are you gonna do about it?" Backing up slowly as the cook moved forward.

"I-I'll kill you and eat you for dinner!"

"Go ahead and try." The bear retorted and then leaned slowly forward to the boy's ear and whispered, "I'm going to need you to trust me on this, stay in my arms all the way."

The bear's back had finally met the large glass window and his gaze locked with the cook, "We'll meet in hell." And with that he thrust his body backwards, crashing into the window and falling down with the boy still in his arms.

Ciel watched as the glass shards seemed to surround him on all sides and felt his body moving backwards with the bears, the sensation of falling slowly took hold of him when they were outside and the window was slowly growing farther and farther away. _Am I going to die?_ he blankly wondered.

But the sensation suddenly stopped when his body pressed against soft fur, cushioning his fall. He slowly looked behind him, only to see the bear covered with splotches of red and breathing deeply. "We're g-getting through this, buddy." the bear managed to smile and slowly stood up with the boy.

"D-did he just jump out the window!?" Bardroy screamed from above, looking out as the bear quickly regained himself, picking up the master and carrying him as he made a break for his van.

He carefully laid the boy down into the back and sealed the door shut, ironically receiving no complaints from the boy and was quick to enter the driver's side and speed away.

"Dammit!" Bardroy screamed from where he watched, both his hands making a mess of his hair as he ruffled it angrily. He slammed a fist onto the ground in his frustration. But something new just surfaced in his mind. _That bear... it's no ordinary bear. No, it's __**him**__._

When the other two servants encountered Bardroy, his eyes were dull and lifeless, almost like a walking zombie.

"What's wrong Bard?" Finny was the first to ask.

Bardroy murmured the same sentence over and over as he shook with fear, hugging himself as if that would provide any comfort.

Finny and MeyRin leaned in to hear what Bardroy had to say.

"I'm going to be shanked..." he whispered it over and over.

"Oh come on Bardroy!" Meyrin laughed nervously, "You know if we had set the whole manor ablaze, on accident of course, we could always cover it up like we always do!"

Bardroy's eyes darted upwards, now clearly filled with fear and he grabbed the maid by her shoulders and shook her slightly, "I-I saw him... with my own two eyes. The infamous Pedobear has kidnapped the young master!"

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**I just love ranting in my author's notes. Hmmmm... what to say. I don't care if you people don't want to read about my life, no one's forcing you, but I'm gonna fucking write it anyway. Well, I suppose I have a story to share then. While I was writing yesterday, I came upon a rather interesting spectacle. **

**My cat. The one and only fatass, Princess.**

**Though I love this cat very much, I couldn't help but feel that she can stand to loose a few pounds (more like 20). So she was laying there staring at something. I looked over and she was staring at a cricket. She didn't seem interested in pursuing it, as from what I've seen she NEVER gets up unless she actually wants something or wants to cuddle up, so she just kind of laid there. Only a few seconds later did she practically fucking sprint she FELL on that cricket, like a mix between a pounce and just a belly flop XD But the cricket was too clever and jumped quickly out of harms way, leaving my cat stunned. The cricket and the cat battled, blood and bone, my cat seemed to be loosing as she was just kind of flopping around clawing at the air and so they continued their battle behind the sofa, which I could not see. Although I did not watch the rest of it, I KNOW that smartass cricket survived. Because that night we heard the same chirping once again. But that was soon fixed when my dad thought it was in the fireplace, checked, and turned it on and proceeded to BURN the thing alive. May you rest in peace Mr. Cricket, I guess this chapter could be dedicated to you XD **

**OH and I know this is fucking random (if you haven't noticed already, I curse wayyy too much, bad habit yes but I can write sophisticated and ALL THAT JAZZ~!) but I was listening to "Demons" by The Sleigh Bells and I couldn't help but think about how much it reminds me of Ciel and Sebastian's relationship O.e It's badass, look it up. **

**But this crack story is seriously a breath of fresh air for me (I mostly write humor/parody stories anyway) but for a crack story I can literally do whatever the hell I want! :D SO MANY IDEAS :U Drop a review and follow and favorite and thanks for reading!**


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